Just over three weeks after surgery. It’s much better than it was. I’m weight bearing at 10% and that’s going okay.
My hip doesn’t like being in one position for too long; it gets sore. The front of my thigh is sore from physical therapy exercises. I was lying on my right side this evening with my leg draped over Xander but apparently not completely supported; when I got up, nerves all the way down my leg, all the way to my foot, suddenly felt like they were on fire. It was intensely painful for several minutes, enough that I had tears running down my face. It didn’t hurt while I was lying down, but it was very clear that I’d screwed up as soon as I stood up. I will make absolutely sure that my whole leg is supported from now on. My left foot gets cold more easily than my right, which is not that surprising since I don’t use it as much so there isn’t as much bloodflow. My left knee sometimes twinges at me.
On the other hand, I can put 10% of my weight on it. I can take a shower by myself as long as Xander shifts the shower head over towards the wall before I get in; I can do the rest. I can get dressed without help. I can make a sandwich, at least a basic peanut butter one, if I need to. I can pick up Katja and snuggle her as long as I’m careful about it. I’ve figured out how to stand up without putting weight on the left leg, which means that I can help a little bit more. I can change a diaper now as long as Katja cooperates, which she generally does. I can fold laundry, though I can’t put it away unless Xander carries the basket into other rooms.
I don’t take any painkillers during the day now. I sometimes take Ibuprofen at night, but it isn’t consistently necessary. My hip aches often, but not enough to force me to take drugs. My sleep schedule is still screwy, but taking melatonin seems to be evening that out slowly. I was waking up at 3:00 AM and not being able to go back to sleep, but this morning I slept until 6 and it felt good. I’m still tired all the time and my temper is shorter than it should be. I don’t have much patience. I’m having a hard time not feeling somewhat depressed because I’m not really pulling my weight, to say the least, and I’m not getting my endorphin fix. I’ll get to start swimming again soon, since the incisions are almost healed. One of them is completely healed. The other two are still scabbed over. Once I can get back in the water, I’m hoping my emotions will even out some and my frustrations will ease somewhat.
I’m trying to be patient with myself. Xander is taking very good care of me. My mom and his family have been helpful, too. Katja still flings herself at me, but we’re both learning to deal with it.
I knew it would be a slow process. Less than a month in, even with all the gains I know I’ve made, it’s very difficult to feel like it’s going well. I know intellectually that it’s going really well. Emotionally, though, it’s difficult to deal with getting tired just from spending a day at work when three months ago I ran (well, ran and walked) a half marathon.
Slow, steady progress. I have to be okay with that or I’ll do myself damage and it will take even longer.